You had me at Meow

I'll be the first to admit that I come off like a crazy cat lady, but I wasn't always a big cat fan.  When I was younger, I loved dogs.  I wanted a dog more than anything!  I remember one Christmas asking for two things:  a puppy and a Tamagotchi.  During my sister's annual "present raid" she told me that "Santa" got me both!  I was so excited until Christmas morning when I found out it was a Tamagotchi that was a puppy.  Pretty disappointing for me, but that never stopped me begging for a dog.  The day we brought Mia home, I had mixed feelings.

Mia

Mia was our first cat.  She was a very pretty, very typically independent cat. If you tried to get near her, it had to be on her terms.  That didn't stop me from trying to play with her as if she were a dog.  Let's just say, it didn't go well.  I still continued to pester my mom about getting a dog.  Preferably a Jack Russell Terrier!  I wanted a dog like Wishbone!

What's the story Wishbone?

The thing about Jack Russell Terriers are that they are known to be really hyper dogs and do not go well with cats.  I got a little mad at Mia for costing me my dream dog... and then he happened...

It was a cold December night.  My mom had made Shake and Bake chicken legs and my dad had just gotten home.  My dad, at the time, rode his bike to and from work.  That night, a little furball followed him home from the mailboxes.  He refused to leave our porch and had the loudest cry for such a little creature.  He wanted food.  Despite the fact that he had on a pink flea collar, we put Mia in the other room to protect her from any foreign diseases and we let the furball in for food.  He waltzed right in as if he owned the place!  Noticing this, I said "Hey, Buster!  What do you think you are doing?!" and the name stuck.

My mom had already told me at the time that he wouldn't be staying so in order to keep myself from getting attached to him, I sat with Mia in my room promising her this strange kitten wasn't sticking around for very long.  No wonder she hated me!!!!  Later that evening, my mom and I drove around to find the kitten's home.  No one claimed him but we knew he belonged to someone if he had a flea collar on.  On our way home, we pulled the car over a few houses down from our house to drop him off.  Our hope was that he would turn the other way and find where he came from.  When we pulled into our driveway, I turned to look in the direction where we dropped him off.  I half expected him to already be gone but as I looked down the road, I saw that little kitten under the streetlights looking my way.  He started running towards me!  I met him half way and tried to convince my mom to let us keep him.  At the time, she didn't budge.

I went to bed that night with the kitten outside and in the morning I found that same kitten in my mom's room.  I guess after I fell asleep, it started snowing and my mom felt so bad because he stayed on our porch meowing.  The next several weeks, we put up fliers at the local vet offices and looked around for his owner.  With no luck, we decided he had already found his home.

Baby Buster

Now the thing about Buster is that he is extremely patient.  He would tolerate me playing rough with him.  Let's face it, I was still a twelve year old girl who wanted a dog but Buster seemed to be a perfect fit for me.  Physically he wasn't a dog, yet he had similar characteristics about him as he is loyal and trusting.  Throughout the years, I managed to teach him dog-like tricks.  There have been hours of trying to get him to walk on a leash, play fetch, sit on command, shake paws (and switch paws on command) and even play dead.

Reunited after a 5 month adventure in New Zealand

Truth is, he was/is my best friend.  If Buster had been a dog, I would be a crazy dog person right now, but I wouldn't change him for anything else in the world!  He has always been there through all the good and bad times in the past 12 years of my life.  He was there when friendships ended, my parents divorced and on days I wanted to run away from home. He was even there when I left for Europe, New Zealand, and college and more importantly, he was always there when I returned.  When it comes down to it, I am a crazy cat lady today because he was always there.  Even as I write this, he is cuddled next to my lap.  It's a bond that is not easily explained and I've never had another friendship this strong.  I trust him more than I trust most people.  I've had quite a few amazing moments in my life, but none of them compare to that December night where my best friend found me.

Can you take off the mask?

I'm using this blog as a way to say what I need to say without physically saying it. I'll be the first to admit that I'm not the best person when confronting issues face to face. In fact, I'm not even great at sharing my thoughts face to face. These days things are resolved Facebook to Facebook...

As if hiding behind a mask, we use technology these days to say things that could be awkward to say in person. How many people do you pass on the street who are willing to share with you what they had for breakfast? Hopefully very few. However people feel comfortable sharing information like that behind social networking sites. What comes at a price is when people share things that are too personal. 

Confronting a person can lead to an awkward situation. Now that people hide behind the mask of technology, they would rather share conflicts publicly rather than between person to person. How does this make it better? Sure, you may be able to communicate that issue with that person and not have an awkward moment face to face but everyone else in the Internet world has access to the problem now too! This world has enough problems in it without more drama being added in.

It becomes like an addiction. How easy is it to delete a Facebook account? The more you get involved in the mask, the harder it is to take that mask off. It becomes your life and before you know it, you are constantly involved in it. All your friends, family, neighbors, and coworkers are there. Everyone seems to be in the same place, as if it was right where you left them. 

It gives a false sense of popularity. When you have access to everyone at once, you feel connected and wanted even though a lot of the people who are there you may not have had actual contact with since high school. What makes this more important than reality? People share things on social media networks that they wouldn't normally share so you start to feel even more connected.

I'll be the first to admit I hide behind a mask often. This post is me hiding behind a mask. That is today's society. There are things you talk about and things not to talk about, things that are too uncomfortable to talk about but are easier when made public because you get support from people you haven't spoken to or seen in the last five years. 

Eventually, my mask will come off. This blog is my comfort zone in the meantime but eventually I will be better handling situations without having a phone or a computer to hide behind. 

Something fresh for dinner

People who know me know that I don't cook, except that I make a mean grilled cheese sandwich. Tonight I decided to step out of my frying a sandwich comfort zone! 

What did I end up making? 

Starting from the inspiration, last weekend I had a friend over who I met in New Zealand and visited in Portugal, Maria. In both locations I was wowed by her sense of creativity in the kitchen. She was able to dig up anything from the refrigerator and make it delicious! She taught me two things I will always remember in the kitchen from now on: experimentation and confidence are important. Some things may not work but you shouldn't give up trying to find the ways that do work. She showed me to make a sauce just with tomatoes and cucumbers in pasta. She added pears which ended up being a sweet but delightful addition to the mix. We all have to start somewhere so I tried to recreate this dish. 

Even though I didn't have pears to add this time, it was still equally delicious! I found that making my own dinner completely from scratch, I feel more satisfied with my meal. My appetite wasn't very big after standing over the stove going through the motions of cooking. I feel healthier by having fresh ingredients. And finally, I feel very accomplished by having created something delicious as a result. I can't wait to go to the store next to try my own creation!

Beginning the Journey

Greetings All!

Welcome to the blog of my mind!  I will be using this space as my way of getting out the most inner workings of my mind.  It will be my therapeutic to express myself and my thoughts fully.  To be clear, this blog isn't for you, or any of the readers it may attract.  This is for me. 

Speaking of me, I'm Caitlin.  I went to school for graphic design and have obtained my Bachelor's of Science.  Since then, I enjoy freelance graphic design and photography.  For my day job, I work at a local staffing agency. I love to travel which was my inspiration for my very first blog:  Northern Kiwi Travels to New Zealand.  I have been to Paris, London, Rome, Portugal, Sweden, Australia, and studied for a semester in Auckland, New Zealand.  Whenever my travels come to an end, I always come home to the familiar face of my loyal cat, Buster.  My boyfriend, Andrew and I have recently moved from Vermont to Maine and have acquired another little kitten whom we have named Myles (or one of his many nicknames: Mules).  I know I have a tendency to come off as a crazy cat lady, and I can accept that.

I have found that every moment I've lived, every experience I have been through, and every heartbreak I have endured have lead me to become who I am today.  Every experience, both good and bad, are equally important to a person's development and even deciding which way to walk down the street affects the outcome of the rest of that person's life. That is why we are here... just to live it.  But we will get into more of that later on.  As of now, thank you for joining my thoughts. Please sit back, and enjoy the ride!